Dear Jerry,
D o you remember in the 90's when America's team was winning Super Bowls instead of being happy with one playoff win in 12 years? Well I do because I am life long fan! I was a fan before you bought the team and I'm sure I'll be fan after your gone! As a fan I have watched you dance around questions and make dumb personal decision after dumb personal decision that has had negative affect on my favorite franchise! How did promoting Dave Campo go? What about letting Sean Payton walk?
Let me ask you this Jerry, How did you win those Super Bowls in the 90's? You drafted the best talent available and you inked every superstar free agent that's how! Well the salary cap is off this year and what have you done? Nothing! I watched Karlos Dansby go to the Big Tuna on South Beach. The Bears got Peps but yet you have done nothing! You might be saying the Cowboys D was #6 overall last year which is pretty good! Well add those two and who is going to score on us ever again? Do you think the Vikes would of hung 34 on The Boys if Peppers and Ware were chasing down old man river? Absolutely not!
OK what about Tony Romo and that big O? So you'll give up a 1 and 3 for Roy "Pants on the ground" Williams but not a 3 and 4 for Anquan Boldin? Or here's a thought maybe you should of called the Cards offered up Tashard Choice and a 3 for Boldin. Then you could of went out and got a workhorse like Thomas Jones to help Barber and Jones carry the load! Yet again you did nothing.
Question: Do you think there is a chance in hell that the Cowboys play in 2011 Super Bowl at your new house?
Answer: No!
The best thing you can do Jerry is keep whoring that place out to help pay for it. Keep showing us everything from college basketball to monster trucks from Paul Mccartney to The NBA All Star game from Taylor Swift to people doing it on the bathroom floor because as of now you are giving us nothing worth watching from your team in 2011! We all know how this story goes
The draft is coming up and all I can do is beg you to make an impact Jerry! Show the rest of the NFL how it is done like you use to! While I may hope and pray that happens the chances are slim to none. J Jones go kick some tires and light some fires and let's get Dallas the bling bling super bowl ring!
Sincerely,
Larry "Life Long Fan" Stanley
PS You can email me at larry@bigbadsportsdaddy.com
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
Texas Independence Day!
Happy Texas Independence Day! As I celebrate with my Lone Star Beer and bar b que I thought I would take a second and give some of my favorite teams some Texas size advice!
TO The Cowboys: Jesus Jerry! You own America's team prove it! You are no Sam Houston sir! 1 playoff win in 12 years is not acceptable around here! Prove that America and the best Texas team ever is worthy! Bowl or bust Jerry! Or how about this no Super Bowl next year and we will hand you over to the Mexican Drug Cartel! Deal sir? Lately you've been all bust like our hot Texas Women!
To the Mavericks: Go Get Lebron James! Ask yourself what would Davy Crockett do?!
To The Rangers: Every year you suck me in during spring training and I check out around August! You have the Talent! You have Nolan effn Ryan! Now go get that ring!
To The Texas Longhorns: National title or death in 2011!!
And to all my fellow Texans and Good Americans Remember The Alamo
TO The Cowboys: Jesus Jerry! You own America's team prove it! You are no Sam Houston sir! 1 playoff win in 12 years is not acceptable around here! Prove that America and the best Texas team ever is worthy! Bowl or bust Jerry! Or how about this no Super Bowl next year and we will hand you over to the Mexican Drug Cartel! Deal sir? Lately you've been all bust like our hot Texas Women!
To the Mavericks: Go Get Lebron James! Ask yourself what would Davy Crockett do?!
To The Rangers: Every year you suck me in during spring training and I check out around August! You have the Talent! You have Nolan effn Ryan! Now go get that ring!
To The Texas Longhorns: National title or death in 2011!!
And to all my fellow Texans and Good Americans Remember The Alamo
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Batter up
Don't you love spring training time?
Each team is a contender when their pitchers and catchers report. Do you remember Rick Vaughn, Willie Mays Hayes and Jake Taylor? Those misfits pulled it together to win the pennant for the Cleveland "Hollywood" Indians in Major League.
Here’s a real life example, the 2008 Tampa Bay Rays were one of those long shot teams that came into the ’08 spring season and had few fans, but those fans would have said their Rays were contenders before the season started. Who would’ve thought that they would’ve played in a World Series before our Texas Rangers?
Our beloved Texas Rangers, the little team that can't quite get it done! As a life long Rangers fan, I've watched and cussed at more games than any one man should have. From Pete O’Brien, to Will Clark, to Rafael Palmeiro, Dean Palmer, Scott Fletcher, Larry Parrish, Geno Petralli, Pudge and Juando - I've been there! As a Rangers fan, you get used to disappointment year after year! You know the pattern, the Rangers will look good until the All Star Break in July, then it's all down hill from there. One of my friend’s favorite sayings is: "Well, the Rangers got us to football season again."
In the past, I’ve always been a pessimist when in comes to the Rangers. I’ve been disappointed too many times to have my dreams crushed by them again. It's like a bad relationship, only there’s no chance of this one ending in a murder suicide. This year is going to be different! There’s something special going on at that little ballpark in Arlington! Can you feel it? There is one thing I can guarantee you that you will not hear in 2010, and that is “this guy” in a sports bar saying “Texas Rangers, No Chance!”
It's no secret that the Rangers main problem has always been pitching. Well, I can't think of a deeper group of pitchers in the history of this club. I do hate the fact that they traded Kevin Millwood for a bag of used baseballs; however, this will open up a spot for one of our young kids to step up and prove that they have what it takes. Let's pray that the newly acquired Rich Harden stays healthy and that Scott Feldman can return to his early ‘09 form.
The signing of Vladimir "Ranger Killer" Guerrero will be huge for the upcoming season. I know he's 80; however, when you can hit like he does, your age doesn't matter! He has a career.440 batting average at The Ball Park in Arlington. Bottom line- he adds more power to an already loaded line up!
The Rangers need Ian Kinsler and Josh Hamilton to stay healthy this season. Josh never really got it together last year. He went down early in the season with an injury and returned only to injure his shoulder again. No bueno Hamilton! Josh, stay off the sauce and remember the walls in the outfield don't give!
I'm going to beat Josh Lewin and Tom Grieve to it. I’m making "the call" right here and right now: The 2010 World Series will be your Texas Rangers vs. the Philadelphia Phillies.
Send your hate mail to:
larry@bigbadsportsdaddy.com
Chin-Chin and Happy Baseball
Larry Stanley
Each team is a contender when their pitchers and catchers report. Do you remember Rick Vaughn, Willie Mays Hayes and Jake Taylor? Those misfits pulled it together to win the pennant for the Cleveland "Hollywood" Indians in Major League.
Here’s a real life example, the 2008 Tampa Bay Rays were one of those long shot teams that came into the ’08 spring season and had few fans, but those fans would have said their Rays were contenders before the season started. Who would’ve thought that they would’ve played in a World Series before our Texas Rangers?
Our beloved Texas Rangers, the little team that can't quite get it done! As a life long Rangers fan, I've watched and cussed at more games than any one man should have. From Pete O’Brien, to Will Clark, to Rafael Palmeiro, Dean Palmer, Scott Fletcher, Larry Parrish, Geno Petralli, Pudge and Juando - I've been there! As a Rangers fan, you get used to disappointment year after year! You know the pattern, the Rangers will look good until the All Star Break in July, then it's all down hill from there. One of my friend’s favorite sayings is: "Well, the Rangers got us to football season again."
In the past, I’ve always been a pessimist when in comes to the Rangers. I’ve been disappointed too many times to have my dreams crushed by them again. It's like a bad relationship, only there’s no chance of this one ending in a murder suicide. This year is going to be different! There’s something special going on at that little ballpark in Arlington! Can you feel it? There is one thing I can guarantee you that you will not hear in 2010, and that is “this guy” in a sports bar saying “Texas Rangers, No Chance!”
It's no secret that the Rangers main problem has always been pitching. Well, I can't think of a deeper group of pitchers in the history of this club. I do hate the fact that they traded Kevin Millwood for a bag of used baseballs; however, this will open up a spot for one of our young kids to step up and prove that they have what it takes. Let's pray that the newly acquired Rich Harden stays healthy and that Scott Feldman can return to his early ‘09 form.
The signing of Vladimir "Ranger Killer" Guerrero will be huge for the upcoming season. I know he's 80; however, when you can hit like he does, your age doesn't matter! He has a career.440 batting average at The Ball Park in Arlington. Bottom line- he adds more power to an already loaded line up!
The Rangers need Ian Kinsler and Josh Hamilton to stay healthy this season. Josh never really got it together last year. He went down early in the season with an injury and returned only to injure his shoulder again. No bueno Hamilton! Josh, stay off the sauce and remember the walls in the outfield don't give!
I'm going to beat Josh Lewin and Tom Grieve to it. I’m making "the call" right here and right now: The 2010 World Series will be your Texas Rangers vs. the Philadelphia Phillies.
Send your hate mail to:
larry@bigbadsportsdaddy.com
Chin-Chin and Happy Baseball
Larry Stanley
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Letter to NBC
Dear NBC and International Olympic Committee
After watching a few hours your Olympic coverage I thought I would share something with you that the rest of the world figured out a long time ago. FIGURE SKATING BLOWS! If you want better ratings you should air more snowboarding events and people skiing around and shooting stuff! Keep showing this crap and the midnight showing of Manswers will have more viewers then you!
Let me help you out ! Here's a list of some events no one cares about! Women's Hockey,Men's Hockey, Ski jumping,Curling and Figure Skating! Do you need ideas for new sports? Here's a suggestion
Please tell Bob Costas he can suck it dry! Do you want ratings? Then all you have to do is hire Connon O'Brien to host the show from media village. That guy is Entertaining! Have you seen him?
Go Sean White!!!
Sincerely,
A pissed off Angry Olympic Non Figure Skating watching American!
After watching a few hours your Olympic coverage I thought I would share something with you that the rest of the world figured out a long time ago. FIGURE SKATING BLOWS! If you want better ratings you should air more snowboarding events and people skiing around and shooting stuff! Keep showing this crap and the midnight showing of Manswers will have more viewers then you!
Let me help you out ! Here's a list of some events no one cares about! Women's Hockey,Men's Hockey, Ski jumping,Curling and Figure Skating! Do you need ideas for new sports? Here's a suggestion
Please tell Bob Costas he can suck it dry! Do you want ratings? Then all you have to do is hire Connon O'Brien to host the show from media village. That guy is Entertaining! Have you seen him?
Go Sean White!!!
Sincerely,
A pissed off Angry Olympic Non Figure Skating watching American!
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Save the BS, BF
It started already! Two minutes after the Vikings were eliminated from the 2009 NFL football season Curt Menefee uttered the words we all did not want to hear " Most of that Vikings Locker Room thinks Brett will retire now."! It was like nails on a chalkboard to me! Really Curt? We just watched one of the best NFC Championship games in recent history and this is what you have to say?
In 2008 and 2009 we had the pleasure of Brett Favre's name dominating the off season news! There is a pennant race going on? Who cares? Brett just said he was wearing green underwear today! NBA Finals coverage? No go! Lets go interview a guy who talked to Brett Favre in line at the grocery store in 2003! NFL draft? Is Brett Favre in it? You get it! We are one step away from knowing when he bms!
I am just going to Dwight K Schrute the facts and they are as follows:
Fact: Brett sign a 2 year deal with Minnesota
Fact: Some how Brett Favre put up a great year at his age
Fact: Brett can taste another Super Bowl
Fact: Brett will have another tearful good bye press conference
Fact: Brett will come back in June ready to play
Brett do us all a favor and save it. Don't open your effn month until you are 100% sure wither or not you are going to play next year!Do you realize you are punishing the good American People and sports fans everywhere? Are you a terrorist Brett? Is this some kind of AL-Queda mind game? Or are you that egotistical and vain that you have to see your name on SportsCenter every night? Are you afraid people will forget the Great Brett Favre? We will never forget how your last pass as Viking was an interception or how your last pass as a Jet was an interception or how your last pass as a Packer was a well.....
Brett you may be a sorry selfish human but you are still fun to watch! I beg you please take this off season off and don't let us see you again until July!
larry@bigbadsportsdaddy.com
In 2008 and 2009 we had the pleasure of Brett Favre's name dominating the off season news! There is a pennant race going on? Who cares? Brett just said he was wearing green underwear today! NBA Finals coverage? No go! Lets go interview a guy who talked to Brett Favre in line at the grocery store in 2003! NFL draft? Is Brett Favre in it? You get it! We are one step away from knowing when he bms!
I am just going to Dwight K Schrute the facts and they are as follows:
Fact: Brett sign a 2 year deal with Minnesota
Fact: Some how Brett Favre put up a great year at his age
Fact: Brett can taste another Super Bowl
Fact: Brett will have another tearful good bye press conference
Fact: Brett will come back in June ready to play
Brett do us all a favor and save it. Don't open your effn month until you are 100% sure wither or not you are going to play next year!Do you realize you are punishing the good American People and sports fans everywhere? Are you a terrorist Brett? Is this some kind of AL-Queda mind game? Or are you that egotistical and vain that you have to see your name on SportsCenter every night? Are you afraid people will forget the Great Brett Favre? We will never forget how your last pass as Viking was an interception or how your last pass as a Jet was an interception or how your last pass as a Packer was a well.....
Brett you may be a sorry selfish human but you are still fun to watch! I beg you please take this off season off and don't let us see you again until July!
larry@bigbadsportsdaddy.com
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Tiger Woods Sex Addict or Just a Dude
Tiger, Tiger, Tiger that's all we have heard about since Thanksgiving! Now the news broke that the former king of the PGA Tiger Woods is receiving treatment for sexual addiction at a sex rehabilitation clinic in Hattiesburg, Mississippi. My first question is what do they do at a sex rehab? Do they have an orderly waiting outside the bathroom door with a stop watch to make sure the patients aren't having to much fun in there? I also have to ask is it really a good idea to put a bunch of "sex addicts" in the same small area? To steal a line from 30 Rock " I'm a self diagnosed sex addict thanks to webmd.com."
Now lets take young Tiger here a very successful young American male. Now from all accounts that I've read his dad pushed him through high school and college to play golf. I'm guessing he was kind of a dorky kid! He looks like he was anyways. I bet instead of going to parties he was playing twilight golf at putt putt. He had to get his short game down, you know? Tiger seems like the type of guy who didn't have a lot of luck with the ladies until he was out school wearing the Nike swoosh and getting paid.
So lets take this goofy looking dorky kid and give him millions of dollars and a very successful golf career. Lets call him one of the most recognized athletes on the planet! The old saying that he could have any girl he wants pretty much describes this guy now. He gets a hot trophy wife on the advice of some of his people. Of course he doesn't marry for love but because his agent and pr person told him it would be good for his image if he were to take a bride. Then after she pops out a couple of cubs Tiger starts thinking about all the strange he has missed out on. I'm no Dr. Melfi, but I would think this is normal male behavior. Then one day while eating breakfast at IHOP the thought runs through his head "I bet I can get that waitress!" Of course you can dude! You're Tiger effn Woods and she is an IHOP waitress! It's not cheating if you don't get caught right Tiger? In this case he gets away with it easy. So he does it again and again and again and again and again and again! You get the point. Then one day he gets caught when his wife decides to check his cell phone. T-R-O-U-B-L-E in Tigerville!
Tiger's only mistake is getting married! He could of nalied Elin and moved on and his infidelity never would of happen. Instead he listen to the wrong advice and tried to be something he is not which is a husband and family man! Thus causing Elin to go Roy Mcavoy on his face and chase him down the drive way.
Tiger Woods Sex addict makes me laugh! Tiger Woods is a dude! Like any dude he wants to know what is out there. He didn't have the chance like most of us to do it in high school and college. Make no mistake Tiger is not a sex addict but a red blooded male! I am betting he lives and learns and even if he never plays golf again I bet his second marriage will work out. Or should I say at least it won't end due to adulterous affairs
On a side note Tiger Woods Ho Golf is Awesome! It's a video game and if you need a good time kill at work here's the link!
http://www.atom.com/fun_games/tiger_woods_defense/?xrs=eml_121709
Want to Comment on this blog? Email larry@bigbadsportsdaddy.com
Now lets take young Tiger here a very successful young American male. Now from all accounts that I've read his dad pushed him through high school and college to play golf. I'm guessing he was kind of a dorky kid! He looks like he was anyways. I bet instead of going to parties he was playing twilight golf at putt putt. He had to get his short game down, you know? Tiger seems like the type of guy who didn't have a lot of luck with the ladies until he was out school wearing the Nike swoosh and getting paid.
So lets take this goofy looking dorky kid and give him millions of dollars and a very successful golf career. Lets call him one of the most recognized athletes on the planet! The old saying that he could have any girl he wants pretty much describes this guy now. He gets a hot trophy wife on the advice of some of his people. Of course he doesn't marry for love but because his agent and pr person told him it would be good for his image if he were to take a bride. Then after she pops out a couple of cubs Tiger starts thinking about all the strange he has missed out on. I'm no Dr. Melfi, but I would think this is normal male behavior. Then one day while eating breakfast at IHOP the thought runs through his head "I bet I can get that waitress!" Of course you can dude! You're Tiger effn Woods and she is an IHOP waitress! It's not cheating if you don't get caught right Tiger? In this case he gets away with it easy. So he does it again and again and again and again and again and again! You get the point. Then one day he gets caught when his wife decides to check his cell phone. T-R-O-U-B-L-E in Tigerville!
Tiger's only mistake is getting married! He could of nalied Elin and moved on and his infidelity never would of happen. Instead he listen to the wrong advice and tried to be something he is not which is a husband and family man! Thus causing Elin to go Roy Mcavoy on his face and chase him down the drive way.
Tiger Woods Sex addict makes me laugh! Tiger Woods is a dude! Like any dude he wants to know what is out there. He didn't have the chance like most of us to do it in high school and college. Make no mistake Tiger is not a sex addict but a red blooded male! I am betting he lives and learns and even if he never plays golf again I bet his second marriage will work out. Or should I say at least it won't end due to adulterous affairs
On a side note Tiger Woods Ho Golf is Awesome! It's a video game and if you need a good time kill at work here's the link!
http://www.atom.com/fun_games/tiger_woods_defense/?xrs=eml_121709
Want to Comment on this blog? Email larry@bigbadsportsdaddy.com
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Let's Laugh at Steroids
If you are like me you don't care who used steroids when or where. The Babe hit 60 jacks and his only juice was Jack Daniels! If you want to ruin your body for my entertainment I say "go for it monkey". It still takes talent to hit a ball. Have you ever heard of hand eye coordination?
Ok Maris family I get it! You have a legitimate complaint about a bunch of roided out freaks breaking number 9's record. However I am sick of roid talk dominating sports talk media outlet everywhere and I am done!
If you want to read a blog debating whether or not there should be two sets of records or if these guys should all be banned from the books go to espn.com or cnnsi.com. Here on BBSD I am declaring this week National laugh at Steroids week. Join me as I look at the pee your pants funny videos on youtube that are directed at these Hulk Hogans of the baseball world.
The Steroid Song: " 1-2-3 Shots You're Out at the Old Ballgame."
My Balls are Small - A Steroid Love Song - By Mark Lim
Juice Yourself (8 Mile Homeruns)
Coach Hines - Steroid Bust
NEW KATT WILLIAMS Steroids Make Your Dick Little
Got a take on roids? Email me it's larry@bigibadsportsdaddy.com
Ok Maris family I get it! You have a legitimate complaint about a bunch of roided out freaks breaking number 9's record. However I am sick of roid talk dominating sports talk media outlet everywhere and I am done!
If you want to read a blog debating whether or not there should be two sets of records or if these guys should all be banned from the books go to espn.com or cnnsi.com. Here on BBSD I am declaring this week National laugh at Steroids week. Join me as I look at the pee your pants funny videos on youtube that are directed at these Hulk Hogans of the baseball world.
The Steroid Song: " 1-2-3 Shots You're Out at the Old Ballgame."
My Balls are Small - A Steroid Love Song - By Mark Lim
Juice Yourself (8 Mile Homeruns)
Coach Hines - Steroid Bust
NEW KATT WILLIAMS Steroids Make Your Dick Little
Got a take on roids? Email me it's larry@bigibadsportsdaddy.com
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